DUCKS DO IT TOO
good news, everyone.
oh man. one time i was out with a group of friends, it was around 3 in the morning and we’d all just spilled out of this nightclub, all completely smashed, when one guy goes “OI DID YOU SEE THAT? THAT LIGHT JUST THEN??” and this fUCKING LASER DOT ZOOMS PAST US ON THE GROUND AND WE’RE ALL LIKE YOOOOO DAFUQ IS DIS??? I SWEAR TO GOD WE SPENT NEARLY TEN MINUTES CHASING THIS FUCKING THING AROUND THE STREET BEFORE WE FIGURED OUT THERE WAS SOME ASSHOLE LIKE 10 STORIES UP IN THE APARTMENT BEHIND US PISSING HIMSELF.
so yeah. cats, ducks and drunk college students. fucking idiots the lot of them.
but why don’t people want to hug thor?
thor would be a great hugger
#omg just imagine #hiS HUGE ARMS ENCOMPASSING YOU #AND HE’D BE SO HAPPY TO HUG YOU TOO #YOU’D BE LIKE HEY THOR CAN I GET A HUG I’M A HUGE FAN #WHY OF COURSE TINY MIDGARDIAN #ENVELOPES YOU IN HIS ARMS #HE SMELLS LIKE SUNLIGHT #AND HE LAUGHS WHILE HUGGING YOU #AND HE GENUINELY WANTS TO HUG YOU TOO BECAUSE HE LOVES EVERYONE #THOR IS THE BEST
sooooo… i know that you don’t want to go to school tomorrow,
if it makes you feel any better
all you have to do is survive three weeks
it’s winter break
and that means
you get to sit inside, watch netflix, and cover yourself in blankets!!
YOU CAN DO IT BABE
I BELIEVE IN YOU AND I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH
wHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE IN MY HOUSE DO THIS OH MY FUCKING GOD IT TAKES LIKE THREE SECONDS TO CHANGE THE ROLL OF TOLIET PAPER EVERYONE IN THE THIS HOUSE IS A PIECE OF SHIT AND GUESS WHERE THE TOLIET PAPER IS???? NOT ON THE GOD DAMN TOLIET PAPER ROLL HOLDER.
I feel this on a spiritual level
|everyone:||are you okay|
|everyone:||you look tired|
|everyone:||you look upset|
|everyone:||you look confused|
|everyone:||are you mad at me|
|everyone:||what happened to you|
|everyone:||are you sick|
|me:||IT'S MY FACE|
|parent:||*yells at you for 20 minutes*|
|parent:||why are you crying|